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Today is the five year mark of our son’s death. He entered into the presence of His Lord before us!

When well meaning friends told me it would get better I didn’t believe them. The pain was so deep. The loss so real. Life consuming grief matched with unbelievable associated difficulties seemed as if it would swallow me up right then and there.   How does anybody get through these things I thought.  Severe feelings didn’t let up for days, weeks, months, and even into the first couple of years or so.

But here we are, five years after Eddie’s death. It’s been one thousand eight hundred twenty five days, but whose counting? And the verdict?  Well it’s hard to really say it gets easier or gets better. I mean I’m not in that deep dark pit anymore, at least not every day. That’s an amazing gift from our Lord. But I miss my son every day. I miss his son every day. So I guess in real ways regularly we face the loss and daily we cry out to Him for His comfort and strength.

Our faith has grown through the trials. We’ve learned in real ways that not everything is under our control and often we must adjust our lives to the control and decisions of others, even unbiblical decisions. We trust God with our lives. We trust Him to do what He wills with our lives, our family, and our extended family.  Nothing has dethroned God in our lives.

It does seem impossible at times to make it through the day. Sights, sounds, smells, songs, pictures, and memories all flood my mind and surround our house reminding us of that boy who grew into such a wonderful godly young man.  He and his son are so very missed.

I’m thankful for the time I did get with him. His testimony of the beginnings of his life and how God used him to kept his mom and dad together and how he was greatly instrumental in leading his parents to the Lord is forever treasured! I’m grateful for his sense of humor, his love, his commitment, his passion, his undying loyalty to his family.  I mean I even could stomach his new found appreciation for country music! ha ha I could go on and on.  But I still miss him. A lot.

One day, God promises to make all things new, to right every wrong, to bring out perfect equity and fairness. We’re promised to be reunited with our born again loved ones in the presence of Jesus!

That day can’t come soon enough.

Until then, we press forward toward the upward call of God in Christ Jesus!

1 Thess 4:13-18 (NKJV) But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope.  For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who sleep in Jesus.  For this we say to you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain until the coming of the Lord will by no means precede those who are asleep.  For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and with the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And thus we shall always be with the Lord. Therefore comfort one another with these words.



  • Joy Altman says:

    First of all, I am so very, very sorry. Sorry for the loss of your precious boy; sorry for your grief, which will not end this side of heaven; sorry for the injustices that you’ve endured, which, over two years I’ve never heard you spell out, but only allude to on many occasions. I am so, so sorry, and our Father brings your family to the minds of my family often, to bring your names to His throne.

    It’s not lost on me that at the very time you were here losing a son, we were in China gaining a daughter.

    Thank you for your faithfulness and obedience to our Father in continually pointing to Him and being an example of trusting Him through all the dark and the hard. You honor Him as you teach – and continue to personally show – His sovereignty and redemption.

  • Rhonda Nesbitt says:

    Whenever I learn of a fellow believer having to endure such pain, I often wonder how someone who does not know the Lord goes through such trying times.
    Bless to you, Taylor family !

    Rhonda Nesbitt

  • Suzette Elledge says:

    The Ellege family continues to hold you in constant prayer. We remember so well that time and we attended his service full of sorrow with you. I’d just recently survived my 7th time on life support and couldn’t make sense of why I survived and Eddie was called home. We send you all of our love and will forever hold you all on our prayers

  • Lori Tabar says:

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, I have few words because I can’t imagine what you have gone through with your loss. I know that my heart breaks just thinking of it, we just put all our faith and trust in God and know that one day we will have the answers we seek.

  • Lynn Dananay says:

    My heart breaks for you and your family. I can’t even begin to imagine what you have been through and continue to experience. I want you to know that your openness in your journey through this dark Valley has been such a blessing to me and my walk with the Lord and my faith. Thank you for sharing your life; you truly honor God.

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